Let me take the pressure off. Two people can build something strong without ever reading each other perfectly. Land somewhere around halfway and you are in good shape.

Think about where you both started. Each of you carried decades of your own life into this, whole years of habits and beliefs that formed long before you ever met. Even people who grew up on the same street with the same tastes end up confused by each other. A little mystery is baked in from day one.

So trade the pressure for curiosity. Pick something your partner loves and step toward it, the same way it would warm you to have them step toward what you make. Whatever you still cannot figure out, you are allowed to let it sit there unsolved. People are not puzzles that owe you an answer.

Closeness grows on the ground you actually share, not on cracking every mystery. Find a couple more things you can sink into together, and let the rest drift. That much will carry the two of you a long way.